Published on Yoga Health Journal
Self-care has become a buzzword in recent years, but it’s a buzzword that we all can (and should) get behind! The idea behind self-care is that we care for ourselves before (or while) we care for others, rather than relegating it as an afterthought. After all, the two are intrinsically linked — you can’t fill another’s cup from an empty pitcher! Far from selfish, self-care is actually the best way to ensure that you are being the best version of yourself, treating others as they should be treated, and raising the vibration of the collective whole. Once you know how to care for yourself (which is often difficult for people who identify as people-pleasers) the rest becomes easy. The biggest secret of self-care, however, is using the breath to achieve it.
To reduce stress, we must be able to feel safe and loved in our bodies, just as we are. We can rely on other people or external sources for feelings of love, but a far more reliable method is to provide this ourselves. Self-care — or Bliss Care, as coined by Swellness Coaching and practiced in their new online course Where’s The Bliss? — as a means to be in the present represents something different to everyone, as our personal preferences and situations are totally unique and inimitable; as such, there are a million and one ways to partake in the catch-all term. Some people lean into pampering while others find their souls nourished through education. A select few even define self-care as doing something that might otherwise be considered essential, such as getting the bills paid on time or making sure their kids get breakfast. It all counts if it suits you and nurtures your soul in the truest sense.
Variety is the spice to life and is one of the biggest draws of health-and-happiness seekers towards self-care endeavors. However, therein lies the issue with the popularized, modern idea of self-care: the ever-changing concept leaves plenty of room for it to become marketable, and people’s simple desire to feel bliss is easily exploited. Here, we’re talking about the $30 candles for an aromatherapy treatment or the idea that one can only relax after partaking in a $100 massage. Acupuncture is a great tool for balancing energies, only if you’re able to foot the bill!
If you can afford it, that’s awesome — but self-care should, by no means, be available only to the people who can afford these sort of external indulgences. Expensive smoothies and getting your nails done weekly certainly are enticing, but the idea that you must pay money to care for yourself is not accurate. There are far better ways to achieve bliss, which are far less exclusionary. Let’s break self-care down a bit: the fundamentals of it are that it brings (and keeps) you focused on the present and that you experience love, acceptance, and what it’s like to feel good in your body. Anything that is called self-care should revolve around these relatively few, but exceedingly important, goals.
Would you believe me if I said there’s a way to check all of these boxes, without spending a dime? If you’re thinking yoga, you’re right in a sense; you don’t need anything more than your body, willingness to commit and your breath. However, if we’re talking about self-care fundamentals, there’s nothing more fundamental to your health and wellbeing than your breath.
Often called meditation or pranayama, a controlled and conscious focus on the breath is one of your best avenues to unlocking true acceptance and love for yourself. There is nothing more innately powerful (in a psychosomatic sense) than your breath, as it is one of very few connections between your mind and body. The way you breathe affects your body and mind, and visa versa. It’s been ingrained in our consciousness and society from childhood (how many times have we been told to take a deep breath when we need to calm down?) but its true power is rarely realized or achieved without the intention of doing so.
Whenever your body is in fight or flight mode, one of the first things to change is your breathing pattern. Your breathing becomes short and remains in your upper chest, affording you extreme focus and the ability to make split-second decisions. Unfortunately, this breathing pattern is replicated by almost every person as we navigate our everyday lives, meaning our nervous systems are perpetually in fight or flight mode. No wonder we’re always so stressed out! Simply by consciously controlling our breathing and moving the expansion from our upper chest to our bellies, we take larger breaths and, as a result, we send more oxygen to our brains. The effect is profound and is a way to break through any energetic blockages or ‘stuckness’ that you experience throughout the day.
The great thing about utilizing the breath as a form of self-care is that it defies almost every modern expectation of self-care. Breathing is not glamorous or expensive, nor does it have to take place in an ashram to be real and effective. The most useful breathing happens whenever you need it, in whatever way suits you. Sometimes it’s a few deep breaths amongst traffic or a 5-minute meditation every other morning, but each time you’ll be giving your brain a careful dose of relaxation and love. While there are some fancy ways to meditate, some of the most simple ways are to:
- Use Visualization. Picture a balloon inflating as your lungs and belly do, and then imagine the balloon deflating as you release your breath in a slow, controlled manner.
- Count. Follow the counting pattern that best supports a natural, yet impactful breath. if your uncontrolled inhale lasts for 2 seconds, try and stretch it to 5.
- Follow The Sensation. Feel the air as it rushes through your nostrils, past the back of your throat and into your lungs. Then, follow its path back out of your body.
There’s something truly exquisite about a self-care method that requires nothing — not money, not fancy equipment, nothing more than what’s normally required to keep your human body alive. Isn’t that is the essence of self-care; to show yourself that you are perfect and divine and deserving of love with nothing more than the skin on your body, the ideas in your brain and the breath in your lungs? By valuing your breathe as you are, you are reinforcing this idea automatically, with every inhale and exhale. Breathe in: I am love. Breathe out: I am divine.
Looking at the breath backward, we can use it to examine our current emotional state. Since our breath is what connects our body and our brains, it can offer profound insight for those who desire to look at their self-care more analytically. If we are hyperventilating, we can consciously determine that we are experiencing panic and then we can make an informed decision about how to diminish our panic. If we are holding our breath, we can acknowledge that we are experiencing anxiety and we can adjust our behaviors accordingly. This too is essential self-care — giving your body and mind what it needs to remain calm and collected, even if that is nothing more than identifying the emotion and giving it a name.
This is the magic of the breath. Where body wrap treatments and reiki fall short, the breath is there to fill in the gaps. Some might realize that by getting back to the basic, fundamental building blocks of self-care, we create such a strong structure that the need for other methods is rendered unnecessary. By connecting so strongly to the present moment, you’re experiencing the world in a way that is usually reserved for those who have reached enlightenment, or nirvana. It’s not an overstatement: when you inhale, you breathe in the universe. The universe becomes intertwined in your very being. When you exhale, you surrender a small piece of yourself back to the universe. It’s a deeply nourishing cycle that empowers us, humbles us, and shows us our role in this circle of life.
Breathing is the first thing we do as babies, the last thing we do before we pass on, and the thing we do every other second of our lives to nourish our bodies and brains. Give your breath the recognition it deserves by practicing these few pranayama exercises, and if you’re ready to dive deeper into the concept of Bliss Care, why not spend 30 minutes a day practicing it with the experts from Swellness Coaching?
- Breath to feel grounded and centered: Bliss Breath.Start with your back straight. Place the tip of tongue behind front teeth. Exhale completely around your tongue. Inhale for a count of 4, then hold your breath for 7 seconds, and finally exhale for 8 seconds. Begin to breath in a 4-7-8 pattern. After your last exhale, breathe naturally to exit meditation
- Breath for confidence and energy: Breath of Fire. Set up tall, creating space between the bottom of your rib cage and the top of your hip bones. Begin to inhale rather quickly, then use the muscles of your abdomen and your diaphragm to push the exhale out of your nose. Your abdominal muscles then pull your diaphragm out, inflating your lungs for a short amount of time, before pushing the air out again. The breaths should be short and loud. Do this exercise for as long as is comfortable.
- Breath to cleanse negative energy: Audible Exhalations. Do this pranayama exercise either laying on your back or sitting in a seated position. Inhale through your nose fully, bringing as much air into your lungs as possible. This time, open your mouth and exhale with a loud sigh, fully emptying your lungs. Your eyes may be open and starting at your nose, or they may be closed. Repeat this cleansing breath 3 times.
